Thursday, May 16, 2013

Nasty facts about WoMen.

What you’re about to read i personally think couldn’t be anymore true. No offense to you ladies of course. 
If you have any more suggestions we would be glad to add them in a future post.
 1. Women never have anything to wear. Don’t question the racks of clothes in the closet; you ‘just don’t understand’.
 2. Women do NOT want an honest answer to the question, ‘How do I look?’
 3. When a woman dresses up to go out, she puts on a blouse first. Pants come second. Men work it vice versa.
4. Women own only 1% of the world’s land
5. Women can’t keep secrets. They eat away at them from the inside. And they don’t view it as being untrustworthy, providing they only tell two or three people.
6. Finally, when an act of love ends, women do not feel like sleeping. They feel like talking and kissing. Lame…
7. The two highest IQ’s ever recorded (on a standard test) both belong to women.
8. The English word “girl” was initially used to describe a young person of either sex. It was not until the beginning of the sixteenth century that the term was used specifically to describe a female child
9. Over half a million women die in childbirth every year in Africa and Asia
10. Seventy percent of women would rather have chocolate than sex
11. Women will drive miles out of their way to avoid the possibility of getting lost using a shortcut.
12. The most embarrassing thing for women is to find another woman wearing the same dress at a formal party.
13. If a man goes on a seven-day trip, he’ll pack five days worth of clothes and will wear some things twice; if a woman goes on a seven-day trip she’ll pack 21 outfits because she doesn’t know what she’ll feel like wearing each day.
14. In almost every country worldwide, the life expectancy for women is higher than for men
15. The word “woman” is believed to have derived from the Middle English term wyfman, broken down simply as the wife (wyf) of man.

Wednesday, May 15, 2013

Chaggas’ First Time

 
 By:Sandra Mushi

There is something else you should know before getting married to a Chagga – especially one from the village, kuku wa kienyeji, as vijana wa mjini would call them.  Chaggas are generally not taught about sex – not like our Zaramo cousins who are taught how to gyrate those hips or as Waswahili say – kukata kiuno mpaka jamaa anahonga gari.  Chaggas are taught how to make money and provide for their families. Kyasaka women get married to Chagga men because they can provide – not because they are the Don Juan’s in bed.  Believe me, you’ll be highly disappointed. 

Surprisingly though, Chaggas have nyumba ndogos left, right and centre – again because they provide well, I presume. Chagga men don’t know love – or rather how to love, so we hear everyday from those who are married to Chaggas – but I’m stressing again that they are the best at looking after, erm, provide for their families.  A wife complaining to her Chagga husband about his nyumba ndogos and this will be his typical answer …

             “But Mama, I have given you a butcher, a beauty saloon, a BMW, a Vogue, you go shopping in Paris, London, Dubai and New York.  Your kids go to school in Cape Town.  I provide for you, Mama, so why are you complaining?” 
Yeah, I also don’t know what’s up with Chaggas and butchers. 

Anyway, so as I was saying, Chaggas are generally not taught about pleasing each other – but they do have some tricks up their sleeves.  Sasa this guy fresh from a seminary school gets back home.  Most seminary schools are flooded with Chaggas – not because that pious immaculate calling is only heard by them – hell no – they know they can get the best education there for free!   So this guy, lets call him Nderima, comes fresh from seminary school – and he was fresh in every sense of the word, I will get to that.  With his first class credentials in one hand, it was natural for the parents to start demanding for an in-law.  I mean, si umeshasoma, so what else are you waiting for? 

Nderima’s mother and aunts get busy looking for that perfect mpora – in a few months they got one.  It was a nice wedding, with a lot of vigelegele, mbege and nyamaAll this took place under the slopes of mount Kilimanjaro, like most village’s customs – Mama Nderima and the aunt naturally wanted to know if their son was virile enough.  Basi bwana, on their first night, Mama Nderima and the aunts had their ears glued on his marital door listening to any tell-a-tale sound. Before long their in-law started screaming and moaning.  Smiling proudly Mama Nderima and the aunts left the door, leaving the two in their marital bliss.  Now that’s my boy, Mama Nderima thought proudly as in law continues screaming.
           
  “Uwiiii!  Kiruu mbeee!  Uwiiii!!  Eeeh Ruwa!” in law calls out to her God. 

Every evening Mama Nderima heard the screaming and mourning – the first few weeks she would smile proudly, but after three months she started grimacing.  I mean her mpora’s stomach was still as flat as an ironing board!! I know you are now wondering – no Nderima and his wife didn’t live in the same house with his family packed like sardines like Indians do – Nderima was the last born, being the last son he lived in one of the houses on his father’s compound.   

Anyway, one day Mama Nderima just couldn’t keep it in any longer, so she called mpora in her kitchen.  In the company of a crowing cock, a belching goat and a mooing cow, she started her conversation with her in-law.  Maji yalikuwa mazito, so she just had to ask!  Afterall, what’s the point of having all the riches in the world and being a man without kids?  Aibu!  Ptuuh!  Could her beautiful fattened up mpora be barren?  So before concluding she summoned her mpora.
           
  “Kwani how do you do it?”  Mama Nderima had to ask, when she still couldn’t fathom why her in law still didn’t have a bun in the oven.
             “Well,” her in law started shyly with her eyes glued on the earthen floor, “after we undress, he mounts me and start going in and out – in, erm, um, my belly button.”
             “Belly button?”  Mama Nderima drops the plantain she was peeling in shock.
             “Yes, Mama.” The daughter In law replies quickly not understanding her mother in-law sudden dismay, quickly adding, “but it hurts so bad!” 

Like any Chagga man – Nderima provided well, such mpora didn’t see why she should complain about the painful experience – until after her mother in law brought it up.  Yap, she also had a brand new butcher.  Mama Nderima first covers her mouth with her eyes popping out kama mjusi aliyebanwa na mlango, then her hand moves to her forehead, then to her cheek – then she goes into deep thought.  For a minute there, she looked as if she was doing some Jackie Chan’s moves with that one hand.
             “Before you go to bed tonight, come to me, I will give you something,” she says finally.
            Quickly Mama Nderima grabbed a kibuyu that was at some corner of the room and got to work. 

 Vigorously she started shaking the sour milk calabash. Later in the evening Mama Nderima gives her daughter in law a smaller calabash.
             “After you have undressed, smear some of this on your belly button.” Immediately after Nderima’s door was locked, Mama Nderima glued her ear to it.
            “Uwiiii!  Kiruu mbeee!  Uwiiii!!  Eeeh Ruwa!” this time it was Nderima calling out to his God. 

I tell you, the grunts that came out of the room you would have thought Christmas beberu was being slaughtered.  the earth almost shook, I tell you!  The neighbourhood kids thought mount Kilimanjaro’s valcano was about to erupt.  If Mama Nderima hadn’t known what was going on, she would have charged into the room thinking that her dearest son was being slaughtered and he was about to get possessed na mashetani - for his pathetic perfomance – thanks goodness mpora hadn’t known any better either.
anyway, the small calabash then became Mama Nderima’s daughter in law best friend – and in no time her stomach started swelling.  Of course she had to ask her mother in law exactly what the concoction was.
      
       “Butter, my daughter, good older home churned butter.” 
Sasa while Zaramos are taught about the do’s, don’ts and definitely do’s, Chagga can come up with a few tricks.  It had to take butter for Nderima to know that the belly button wasn’t the cherry he was looking for.  It had to take slippery butter for Nderima to accidentally ‘slide’ into the cherry. Kwahiyo before getting married to a Chagga, make sure there is a very smart mother in law.  Ahem … 

It’s time we ended our dependence on donors



 Courtesy: The Citizen

Donor funding accounts for 29 per cent of our national budget. This means that development projects have been starved of money. But the road gets even more bumpy. Last week, the European Union announced that its funding might not be wholly channelled into the usual kitty – the general budget support – but via other means, including non-governmental organisations. As the saying goes, he who pays the piper calls the tune.

Despite assurances that pledges will be honoured, we acknowledge that the Western world has yet to recover from its own economic woes and grants may not flow as smoothly as expected.
Developing countries have seen financial handouts dwindle before their eyes. Tanzania expected to receive Sh397.051 billion for infrastructure in 2012/13 financial year. But only Sh16.361 billion had been released as of March. Donor funding for development projects in 2013/14 will be Sh397.051 billion.

But MPs have criticised the ministry of Works for seeking parliamentary approval of Sh845.226 billion for improving infrastructure during the coming financial year while no mention has been made of repaying loans. It is understood that, up to March 2013, the ministry owed wananchi and contractors Sh348.666 billion.
The chairman of the Parliamentary Standing Committee on Infrastructure, Prof Juma Kapuya, asked the government whether Sh845.226 billion included payments for part of or all outstanding debts or new projects.

He raised his concern on Monday after Works minister John Magufuli sought approval of Sh1.226 trillion: Sh845.226 billion for development and the balance for recurrent expenditure.
We call on the government to be frugal, widen the tax base, minimise duty waivers,  plug loopholes and fight pilferage and theft. More than five decades of independence and with the benefit of peace, ample resources and skilled workforce, it is a shame for Tanzania to depend on donors to fund its projects--when it ought to be supporting other unfortunate countries financially.

Tuesday, May 14, 2013

The Vendor and I (Mkongoraa,Ugoro Vs Mchemsho and Mtura)



Sunday's are always boring in the afternoon ,am sure there is one out there reading and understanding why am saying so..after Christians come from church it's always family reunion afternoon ,visiting neighbors or going out with mama and papa...lucky for those with families..

Bachelors like i will always wake up with an hangover after having almost a dozen of Smirnoff ice the other night,and when i say waking up i don't mean the early morning ,its always on a sunny afternoon and probably i will be craving for a cold Pepsi and mchemsho to soothe me from the willies i had.

One thing you should know hangovers need a great mchemsho and a cold drink,so the first thing is when you wake up from the effects of the last night drinking you will always be thinking where can i get the best kongoro or mchemsho, and for us who have spent most of our times in the northern part of bongo (Arusha) well known for the best Nyama choma and mchemsho you have no option than the following places ,"sakina bar,Florida,Pin point,Bondeni Bar ,Police mess .

Sasa this Sunday afternoon i decide to go and ease my hangover at a friends pub well known as Bondeni bar,a place where you can find all the flamboyant mine guy's from mererani..the ones that will order 2 crates of booze and invite others to have some for free,a few inappropriate amorous jokes among each other,i always hate it when it noisy but since i prefer mtura(local sausage) from this place i have to tolerate..

The guzzlers noise at point made me happy that i wanted to contribute ,they were all arguing on how David Moyes can cover Ferguson's steps,i was enjoying their conversation as if i was just next to them,soon as i wanted to go join them Mama Vicky arrived with my plate of mchemsho and mtura pembeni..am well known of my selfish habit when it comes to Nyama or Mtura,i believe in individualistic dining so i always sit at a corner enjoying my meal..

One thing i hate most is getting interrupted when am having my meal ,i always fear when somebody gets close might change my plate into a communal one "sharing a mchemsho" you can imagine...Sasa as i was busy enjoying my curried ndizi kuku mchemsho with mtura came a guy who was dressed in drafted red rubega ,who i noticed he was carrying a big moth eaten suck ,and pieces of sticks in his hands known as "mkongoraa and some transparent plastic bag that i noticed some brownish powder in known as Ugoro.

Mkongoraa is a piece of herbal stick believed by the maasai culture that it increases male increment,and for Ugoro stands for brown powdery tobacco...Sasa the Maasai vendor sat next to me and tried to convince me to buy his products,all i know i had a bitter eye upon him but he never realized what it meant ,as he was talking i tried to eat quickly so that he doesn't ending up picking a piece of meat from my plate...

 
He soon or later forgot himself and picked a piece of Mtura and started smiling at me,i was to panic and do something stupid but i really tried to use my anger management classes techniques ,so i said nothing..and the vendor kept on eating ..sasa i lost my appetite due to some hygienic matter ,i thought of the guy not washing his hands i got scared i would catch some E coli..so i called upon mama Vicky ..

Mama Vicky came and washed my hands,she asked me if i did enjoy the meal..I didn't answer that..i left a lot of mtura about half a kilo for the vendor..it did hurt me at some point but all i did is i asked the vendor how much he was selling the Mkongora..."unausaje?? trying to imitate their accent ..."Tano lufuu moja"..i never asked him because i was to buy but i  was being sarcastic since i had a plan...

The guy was busy enjoying the meal that he made me loose my appetite on,"Yerroo endelea kula ,naenda kwa choo nikirudi nikute umeanda Mkongoraa 5". i told him i was going to the toilet so he should prepare me some male increment herbal stick that i am to pick after coming from the latrine.."Yerroo sidaaiii utakuta iko tiyali"...

I left and went to mama Vicky and told her ,the mchemsho she bought me the vendor was to pay for...Mama Vicky asked why ,i told her half of my portion the vendor took so i never enjoyed they meal ,so i left and Mama Vicky remained asking the guy asking for payments....

"yeroo nasema leta pesa yangu".......




  


Monday, May 13, 2013

Homosexuality life in Tanzania pt.2

 Uganda: gay-friendly bar
 image courtesy:

let me begin by explaining the legal situation regarding the rights of homosexuals.

In Tanzania homosexuality is punishable under the Penal Code which states that,
"homosexuality is considered an unnatural act punishable under the Penal Code, Cap. 16 R.E. 2002, section 154 of which provides that any person who (1) has carnal knowledge of any person against the order of nature or… permits a male person to have carnal knowledge of him or her against the order of nature, is guilty of a felony and is liable to imprisonment for 14 years.

Our last article i tried to tell a story that i managed to conduct a research on,explaining the lives of gays i met ,if you remember quite well we had Sasha on interview,but still am trying to collect more for you ,today i have various crucial things that will be able to make you understand the real definition of homosexuality in Tanzania..perhaps you haven't understood the penal code please go back and start reading it again.
One gay i met asked "is it really fair ,enrolling such a penal code?" am a human being i have my rights."

Gays in Tanzania have now come to realize its not all about the society its also about the law ,they first had fear of the society that they can get severely taunted or birched but right now they also have fear for the Law..but chances are if you ask many gay people in Tanzania they are not aware of the penal code.

Homosexuality is a charged topic in Tanzania, where it is illegal, as it is in 37 other African countries.Tanzania is not the only African country where gays are persecuted. In Cameroon, where homosexuality is also illegal, two human-rights lawyers, Alice Nkom and Michel Togue, who defend people accused of homosexuality, have received death threats.

Last time Sasha told us gays in Tanzania leave at peace unlike Uganda,there hasn’t been much scandal yet,they are not so hunted ,so we remember Sasha saying he is comfortable living and practicing gay life in Tanzania...

But homosexuals in Tanzania live in complete obscurity, not telling their parents, relatives or even friends for the fear of being persecuted. This means most of the homosexuals conduct their relations underground through channels they have established. Everything is very secretive.

If you are a good follower we all remember about the late David kato, an openly gay Ugandan teacher and gay-rights activist who was murdered in 2011 in Uganda,this raised a lot of topics gays demanding their rights,after the death of David kato Tanzania gays got scared thinking it will raise awareness to the Tanzanian society,they all thought it was their final destination.

Situation for homosexuality in  women and men is not the same,in Zanzibar, a law was enacted that criminalized female homosexuality, punishable by a maximum of five years in prison. But at the same time, it seems the Penal Code of mainland doesn’t say much about female homosexuality.

In Tanzania mainland there had been some news on tabloid papers of women who were suspected of being homosexuals. There were speculations that some members of the female football team were lesbians but it was never confirmed. There have been speculations of some female celebrities but also this has never been confirmed.

However, I would say male homosexuals face a much more difficult situation compared to females. Being gay is a sign of losing one’s masculinity and also a sign of male weakness. This becomes much more difficult for homosexual who are effeminate since they are more obvious.


****To be continued***



Best Documentary Movies Photographers should watch..

Photography has picked a lot of allies this years,i see different photographers from my country trying to do best portraits..and why lie they are doing good.
 I came across a good but also tricky question "what makes a photograph great?" this was kind of a question that the late Kelvin Carter was asked!!

Today i have a list of best documentary movies about photography and photographers,i understand there plenty of them but i managed to pick a few that i have also watched..

  • Bang Bang club
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/3/3b/The-bang-bang-club-film.jpeg

A drama based on the true-life experiences of four combat photographers capturing the final days of apartheid in South Africa. particularly between 1990 and 1994, from when Nelson Mandela was released from prison to the 1994 elections. Malin Ã…kerman plays the role of Robin Comley who does everything she can to publish the horrific pictures as portrayed by them.

  • War Photographer (2002).  

A study of James Nachtwey on assignment in Kosovo, Palestine and Indonesia using a movie camera attached to his SLR its enlightening how the subjects in these harrowing situations are wholly complicit in the image making process.

  • National Geographic the photographers (1996)
This is an informative and interesting documentary about the NG Photographers and what they do to get "the picture". It was made in 1998 but goes back further than that with anecdotes from the first publication of the magazine. Although I did not think their lives were "glamorous", I had no idea of how remote, dangerous, or heart rending some of their assignments were. I definitely recommend this.
  • William Eggleston in the Real World [2005]

Photographer William Eggleston created a sensation in the art world in 1976 when a collection of his work went on display at the Museum of Modern Art. While the Memphis native's work went against the grain of the conventions of art photography of the day with their heavily saturated colors and oblique, seemingly careless framings, in time critics developed an enthusiasm for his work, and one critic cited the show as "the beginning of modern color photography." Filmmaker Michael Almereyda is an admirer of Eggleston's photography, and created a film portrait of this reclusive artist as he shoots a commissioned assignment in Kentucky.
  
  • Annie Leibovitz – Life Through a Lens [2006]


 
Annie Leibovitz. The film directed by her sister, Barbara Leibovitz, depicts the various phases that shaped her life while tracing her photographic life producing some of today's most recognizable and iconic photos. The film was broadcasted as part of PBS's award-winning series, American Masters, as the finale for its 20th Anniversary season.An absolutely MESMERIZING film.
  •  What Remains: The Life and Work of Sally Mann [2008]
  
is a 2005 film directed and produced by Steven Cantor, which documents the photography and story of photographer Sally Mann at her Virginia farm home. The movie documents the photographer's progression from a child to a mother, and the struggles Mann faces through her public and private life.

  • The Genius of Photography [2007]
The best filmed introduction to the magic of photography. The BBC at its best in six episodes. Interviews with some of the world’s greatest living photographers including William Eggleston, Nan Goldin, William Klein, Martin Parr, Sally Mann, Robert Adams, Juergen Teller, Andreas Gursky and Jeff Wall.

  • Henri Cartier-Bresson: The Impassioned Eye [2006]
Heinz Bütler interviews Henri Cartier-Bresson (1908-2004) late in life. Cartier-Bresson pulls out photographs, comments briefly, and holds them up to Bütler's camera. A few others share observations, including Isabelle Huppert, Arthur Miller, and Josef Koudelka. Cartier-Bresson talks about his travels, including Mexico in the 1930s, imprisonment during World War II, being with Gandhi moments before his assassination, and returning to sketching late in life. He shows us examples. He talks about becoming and being a photographer, about composition, and about some of his secrets to capture the moment.

  • Contacts, Vol. 3: Conceptual Photography (2001)
Features Thomas Struth, Wolfgang Tillmans, Roni Horn, Bernd and Hilla Becher, and other contemporary photographers told in their own words.

  • Bill Owen - Suburbia
   

  • Manufactured Landscapes [2006]
  
Follows Edward Burtynsky at work in China and Bangladesh and the USA. Filmed by Jennifer Baichwal in a complimentary refined aesthetic to Burtynsky’s work. Beautiful.

Sunday, May 12, 2013

Strange But True Facts About Men, Women and Relationships


Couples usually wait until six to eight dates before they are willing to enter into an exclusive relationship.


 40% of women would consider dumping a boyfriend if her friends didn’t like him.



It takes 1 hour for a woman to determine whether or not she wants to date a man again. A man decides in 15 minutes



On an average, women say over 7,000 words per day. Men say only around 2,000.



What is known as a French Kiss in the English speaking world is called an English Kiss in France.



Studies indicate that a man who kisses his wife goodbye when he leaves for work averages a higher income than the guy who doesn’t.



Only 10% of people who leave their marriage end up marrying the person with whom they had an affair. 



The average man sees five women a day with whom he would like to sleep with.



The most common time for breakups is around three to five months.  



Four out of 10 workplace dating relationships result in marriage.



Nearly 40% of men do not feel confident meeting a woman for the first time.



Studies show that schools, colleges, coffee shops, and malls are all excellent places to flirt because people are more open to meeting others in these places. Poor locations are restaurants and movie theaters.



Studies show that before a man even speaks a word, the way he stands (whether he is slouching or not) counts for over 80% of woman’s first impression.



Studies show that men are put off by groups of loud women. If a woman wants to get a date, she should break away from a loud group to give a man a chance to approach her.



If you want to create an instant link with a date, say his or her name at least twice in the conversation. This shows attentiveness and connectiveness.



 Top ten turn-offs for women include cystic acne, raggedy nails, flatulence and belching, missing teeth, body odor, bad breath, hairy nostrils, “man boobs,” “goofy” glasses, and hair “mistakes.



 When a man first approaches a woman, she will base 55% of her initial impression of him on his appearance and body language, 38% on his style of speaking, and 7% on what he actually says.



If a group of women are standing together but their eyes are wandering, they are likely to be looking for guys. If they each take a turn to break away from the group to head to the bathroom alone, they are on the prowl. If they are huddled together giggling, they are usually not interested in finding men.



 If a woman is interested in her date, she will often smile at his jokes, play with her hair, fidget with an object such as a glass, blush when he pays her a compliment, pout or pucker her mouth, stumble over words, or lean in towards him.



 Signs that a woman is not interested in her date include avoiding eye contact, faking a smile or not smiling, leaning away, answering in monosyllables, sagging her shoulders, looking at her watch, tapping her foot, or staring blankly.



Beautiful women typically get more stares, winks, and harassment than average-looking women do, but they are also less likely to get asked out by average-looking men because those men tend to be intimated by them.



Typically, the ideal time to wait to call is two to four days, though no longer than four to five days. Calling too soon can appear desperate. 



Worst places to go on first date include fast-food restaurants, your kids’ birthday party or school play, your parents’ house, strip clubs, a party where your ex will be, church activities, or window shopping.



Choosing exciting places for a first date increases the chances of the other person falling for you. There is a definitive link between danger and physical/romantic attraction. 



 Twenty-nine percent of Americans have had sex on the first date. Bongo mmmh..... I don't think so.



Statistics show that trying to get a relationship to work with an ex doesn’t usually work. 



Five types of women that men tend to avoid are serial flirters, someone who talks about marriage too soon, clingy women, the party-girl, and a woman who talks too much or is drama queen.



Four common date blunders include showing up late, talking about yourself too much, revealing too much about your ex, and an obvious over-eagerness.



Five common signs a man may be cheating in a relationship are that he accuses his partner of cheating, he’s extremely vague, he seems to be compensating by acting extra nice for no reason, he’s always at work, and his partner's friends drop her hints.



Bar counters are curved so other customers can easily “check out” other customers. Bars also purposely place mirrors to help create a larger sense of place and to allow a person to scope out other people behind them. 



Signs that a man is about to break up with a woman include that he spends less time with her, he is no longer romantic, passionate kissing turns into quick pecks (particularly no kiss during sex), he fantasizes about someone else during sex, he pats her during a hug, and he tries to start fights.

Saturday, May 11, 2013

Gaddo: Tanzania Parliament in Session


Not that am not patriot,if there is anybody who loves his country and that is me,but at one point you might not think of me being one, since i cant abide with stupidity..As much as i love and respect my country ,i can not be an accomplice of asininity.

After the war of comments from different people with different perspective towards Gado i decided to write of my own,in some point i wouldn't love to be bias so i start with my own country then to my friend Gado .

The fact that Tanzania parliament has become an organization of jokers is not good at all,there isn't any respect at the parliament perhaps due to stupidity that we all want to tolerate or the fact that higher levels are trying to build a comedy team to entertain the citizens..may you cut the crap and do what you were voted to do..

As times goes by our wabunge are intensely forgetting themselves ,some use words like f*@*k in the same parliament that logic has to be discussed ,and no action is taken ..the fact that somebody does something wrong and he/she doesn't get punished this gives a room for one to do something more insane..

There others who make us citizens think their mentally ill,the same person with  kids at home and a wife plus a whole nation looking at him dares to use abusive words in the parliament .Do you think we are to respect this people as our leaders or are they just drunken idiots?

Sasa  time flies like nothing ,right now their all acting absurd thinking they have it all,two more years and you stand at that stage asking for our votes,that's how insane you can get..they should know that we will disqualify them for the little weaknesses they have and we will never glorify them for the great strength they have shown.

Gaddo may you not worry we all appreciate what you do ,am quite sure the MPS now know you very well,and you will here them complaining that you disrespected them...why care at all ...your message was well portrayed....




Friday, May 10, 2013

QUEENS OF AFRICAN KINGS

BRYNOLF MOSHY

Morning my beautiful princess,
that smile is so flawless,
i cant help the brag,
your far beyond breathless,
everyday is a tale,
under your sweet fortress
i love you ain't the words, 
coz your love is far beyond priceless,
they say a man's trash,
could be a player's treasure,

two minutes of your time,
looks like sweet forever,
a friend or sister,
tender love beyond measure,
 

my heart was at war,
but your affection fell to my surrender,
mistakes of my past,
died by your magical touch,

your smile is my priority,
most definitely your blush,
Indian or Italian lovi davi,
pasta or chilli curry,

African Bantu figure,
that makes my soul linger,
for your care,
affection,
most of all your attention,
 

the world is a rush,
but girl your motivation,
hip hop on the move,
little jazz to dance with ya,
sit down and relax,

see the perfect picture

 



















GEORGE M.E.KYOMUSHULA
 

sura yake ya ajabu,
nimtazamapo sikosi jawabu,
sijawahi kupata taabu,
kwa msichana huyu mwenye adabu,
sitaki kwenda naye club,

huko kuna mambo ya ajabu
nimpendavyo ntapata thawabu,
si kwa Mungu hata toka kwa mababu,

lips zake za ujazo,
kumbusu sipati katazo,
penzi langu kwake si la ku'puzzle,
mimi naye hakuna haja ya mawazo,
Mungu akipenda ntampa ujazo

ew mfitini chuki zako ruhusa uende nazo,
mimi na bibie hakuna vikwazo,

the last man standing,
is the main man claiming,
king of the Queen,
respected in any school like Dean,

I'd recite my verses,
your ears are my dear,
listen to my words clear
flavor through your ears, 


convey a feeling which can heal,
love is what we both feel,
fighting each others shall not come up btn us to thrill,
i do keep it real,
after long walk I got you just like Scott Jill,
You are my LOVE for real..
ain't no silly,

lets love each others for real. 


NELSON ALLEN JUNIOR THENEXTDOORPOET.

Ooh African queen,

your hips are mountainous like mahale
on the shores of lake Tanganyika,
your complexion is as black as ebony,
ooh queen of Africa, 


your lips are reddish and wet like dew upon the red rose...
your hair falls upon your cheek like a tail of a black hoarse,
 

your voice is melodic like songbirds of Serengeti,
your type is rare like a shade beneath a tree in Sahara desert,
 

your tongue is filled with African ancient wisdom and knowledge,
your accent is purely African unmingled with foreign language,

your eyes twinkle like two stars in the dark sky
Your colorful Kangas reveal the beauty of your thick thighs,
you look so natural,

your teeth hidden slightly by your lips shine like a precious mineral,
your physical features are genuinely Afrocentric,
QUEEN you deserve a throne placed on top of Kilimanjaro at Uhuru peak,

ooh African queen you who I've fallen for..
like a leaf On the highway,
you who my soul is craving for unto thee i say,

Makeda the beauty queen of sheba,
King Solomon was your alpha,
let me be your King omega.


 















STEPHEN M BEDA

My African queen,

serve me with your smile bright and long,
longer than Nile black and soft skin,
softer than Spanish tile promise to keep you in my heart,

in that special file what is food when you are here,
with you my empty stomach can go a mile

I'm the East,and you are the sun
from you i rise hun they say you are hot,

well I'm ready for the burn
writing about you is so sweet,

i don't want to get done how long is my mind,
in it you still do the run

Your dad is more of a thorn,
i'll risk it for a rose

Your lovey dovey is so pure,
where was the course give it to me babe,

it's ok if you overdose i can't tell the beauty in you,
more than the victoria shores

Been complimenting for too long,
mind if i pause?


 








 





Thursday, May 9, 2013

ALMOST MOTHER


Was it my kicks in your uterus?
Did i hurt you when i was joyous!
That i had to dance and prance,
To the rhythm of your blood stream,

was it the dizziness that you felt?
When i was twisting and turning
From the right to the left,
Enjoying the food we ate.

Was it the unconcealed big stomach
That you developed
When i turned five month old?

Tell me,
Tell me almost mother!

Did you hate my name 'fetus'
that you had to change it to 'aborted baby'
or you didnt want me in your uterus,
you wanted another kind of baby

why did you have to go to arbotion clinic?
Was it your friends' advice
To end my life so quick
Without even blinking twice?

I was supposed to be your first born,
You denied me that right,
Now im just smooth bones,
Eaten by termites and ants

you were supposed to be my mother,
And you almost were,
But i know you as a murderer,
That never care,

Are You happy now?



nel-sonofAfrica - acknowledged
 
www.facebook.com/poeticallyintoxicated


That girl was on fire..

 
When i listen to Shaggy's song strength of a women or that of Alicia keys super women it brings me memories..this songs explain how women are strong ,how we shouldn't underestimate them,some sort of campaign to raise awareness on women right's...but i had a different perspective after seeing an incident that left me startled..

Confessing here is am used of seeing men punish their loved ones severely,us men can be so brutal to our loved ones at times,I had a friend that could get so jealous that he couldn't control his fist,all he knew is swing around and throw some punches to her girl..things always don't be the same...some time a rupee has to change its side...

We have all heard of stories that men get beaten by their wives,my friends from Musoma,Nyeri,Machame can explain brutal beatings from their enraged women.let me set some scenes that i saw in an earlier incident..

I went to visit a friend who of which i know he is a number one friend who despises women,he is so primitive at some point,all he likes is commanding,the wife is so scared that she is always trembling when called upon,sasa some stupid thing happened  after my friend invited me in he called upon her wife to come and say hi...Misses delayed for a while...

When she came this musee of mine fumed and tried to show how enraged he was and slapped her on spot,and he never realized it was his judgment day..misses moved back (it was like she was looking for space),she lost her temper, fists and slaps were rained upon,he was severely beaten ,i was left speechless after what i saw,i couldn't even choose sides ,that's how scared i got..as i tried to go closer to help she looked at me with these fierce look that shoved off my mood.

The anger she had made me uncomfortable,as she was punishing the husband the song  "girl on fire" by Alicia Keys was bubbling in my mind "this girl is on fire"..truly she was on fire,if this is what we call strength of a woman then we shouldn't despise it.All that time i was wondering where is that vicious friend of mine,the man of the house..master of brutally beatings..he didn't defend himself he just covered his vital organs..

Millions questions raised ,why didn't he defend himself?is he a changed man now (born again christian) or is he waiting for vengeance??

Am trying to explain how convulsed women can be dangerous,provoking them can get you killed...not all women that bare your beatings are cowards some just pretend and some just follow their taboos that tell them to respect their husbands.lets buckle up and stop harassing our women.

WARNING:if you are from East Africa don't dare beat a women from Machame,Musoma(Tanzania),Nyeri (Kenya)...just a warning ...don't end up loosing your manhood...

Wednesday, May 8, 2013

Reasons to why i dont attend concerts..

 
Hold on your horses ,don't let the heading deceive you,not that i don't go to concerts any more but just trying to find a better heading rather than saying "8 Things That Annoy Me About Concerts"..am a party animal,i love anything called a concert and to be clear a good concert is nothing without,the music, hot baby mama's,booze and the rave,that's how pervert you can call me.

Despite loving them concerts ,there things that they surely have made me fed up ,after reading this many will understand what i think.The following are 10 completely subjective things that annoy me about concert-going in this days.

  1. Ticket Prices.  
I have noticed day by day tickets prices become more dense,the fact that one has to pay about 100,000 /= tshs at the gate for a 3 hours show doesn't bring any sense,moreover you also have to struggle finding the tickets ..if one has to buy online tickets has to pay extra fee to get the ticket...you might think am a penny -pincher but am not trying to act stingy all am saying its getting too much...sometimes i pay the cash and yet the artist don't quench my rhythm thirst.

  2.Playback's
 If this is not happening in your lovely country say AMEN,i pay to go and listen somebody sing not the playback from his mix tape or album,if that's what i all wanted i could call upon my lads to warm my house,switch on trace channel and enjoy the vibes. Artist use 3 hours just being absurd walking around at the stage holding their pants and faking them singing/rapping while its the CD at the background playing.Use live bands for god sake.

3.watching a show around a flock of  smartphones and i Pads.
I sometimes rarely see the artist on stage,i wonder where are the so called "vibaka"(thieves) these day's,they can fix this people having the manner of wanting to record the whole show on their smartphones,"excuse me"!! we all pay to have an enjoying concert,not that i don't have a smart phone to also record ,but whats the point ,i see the show with my naked eyes why record then??it sucks when people next to you are taller and they are all taking snaps with their smartphones...aaaarrrgggghhh!!!

4.Big Mouth's (Talkers)
I have always been complaining of absurd people who just want to be noticed by their talking,i went to a concert where we had the lovely RnB singer from Tanzania called Linah,as i was enjoying the show this dazed girl started with all the shouting "OMG...OMGGGG...shez splendid ,my brother schooled with her,ohhh Linah i love yooouuuuuu....Jamani....Linah you rock my world"...PPPssshh

Imagine somebody screaming all that at your ear,please come to your senses ,let Linah rock your world but don't rock my ear girl..!

5.Bandits/burglars/thieves.
In concerts many have different perspectives and intentions,some go to have fun and others to steal things..pick pockets,burglars,carjackers and many kind of thieves,this worries me at concerts..

6.Parking Catastrophe
When it comes to outdoor concerts parking is always a problem ,i will always get trouble parking my worn out beetle (lool),it also gets me troubled when the show is over..i can always have problems finding my way out.

7.Going to the Bathroom
I recently attended to one famous concert hosted by a certain radio station in my country,it was a good concert but what made me hate it is when i went to the bathroom,i surely couldn't conduct my call due to the bathroom being a pool of urine,vomit and stool..i had to go back...that's how things can get ugly at the bathroom concerts.

8.Short shows
I don't get the point where a veteran like Juma nature or professor Jay go on stage and only sing two songs and goes off the stage ,while these artists have more than 5 albums...its owkei for the upcoming ones with only one song but not the juma nature's.

Can Tanzania Afford To Have100 Million Citizens in 2035?


44,929,002. That is how many Tanzanians were counted. They can go on and make the last digit 3 because I had to leave the country a week before the census.

All jokes aside, Tanzania has experienced an exceptionally high population growth – from 11 million in 1963 to about 45 million in 2012. Among the factors that have contributed to this increase –one of the fastest in the world– is the falling mortality rate. Life expectancy in Tanzania has increased over the past two decades from 50 to 58 years.

In addition, Tanzanian women have continued to have many children (5.4 per woman in 2010), which is higher than Kenya and Rwanda (4.6) as well as other sub-Saharan countries with the exception of Uganda.

Since 1991, this rate has only declined by 13 percent in Tanzania against 26 and 31 percent in Rwanda and Kenya, respectively. Several other factors have also contributed to the high population growth rate that Tanzania is experiencing:

Infant mortality has halved over the last 25 years.

Early marriage: the median age at first marriage in 2010 was 18.8 years in Tanzania compared to 20.0 in Kenya and 21.4 in Rwanda.

Early motherhood: 44 percent of Tanzanian women are either pregnant or are mothers by the age of 19.

Insufficient education: Reaching secondary education considerably delays the age at first marriage and girls with secondary education wed at about 23 years in Tanzania, Kenya and Rwanda. In 2010, women who had no education had twice as many children as those who had attained secondary education.

The average desired number of children for Tanzanian women remains high at 5.3 per woman.

Timid family planning programs; The use of contraceptives has stalled with only 27 percent of women using modern contraceptives in 2010 compared with 39 percent and 26 percent in Kenya and Rwanda respectively in the same year.

With the current fertility and mortality rates, Tanzania’s population is projected to reach 100 million in 2035 and 200 million by the end of this century. These projections raise a number of questions:

Will there be enough food to feed 100 million people in 2035?

How can enough jobs be created for the mounting youthful population?

Will there be enough resources to provide high-quality education, infrastructure and other basic services for the coming generation?

Will economic development and urbanization be sufficient to reduce population growth over time?

Should the Government promote family planning programs like Ethiopia and Rwanda have done?

How can more men be encouraged to participate in family planning programs?

Should targeted education programs be implemented to encourage girls to remain in schools?

What should the role of development partners, communities, civil society and religious leaders be?

Note: The statistics used here are extracted from the 2010 World Population Prospects and various issues of Demographic and Health Surveys for Tanzania, Kenya, Uganda and Rwanda. All are publicly available.

What are your thought?

Thursday, May 2, 2013

Legal Corner

LEGAL CORNER

Sia Charles Marunda : Lawyer
Legal & Human Rights Center

Question: I am a woman of 32 years old. I have been working in a company as an accountant for almost eight years now. I have been a very hard worker and sometime I failed to take my annual leave due to our busy work environment. Recently I asked my boss for an unpaid leave of three months, so that I set up my family business and leave a relative managing it while I go back to work and my boss has refuse. What are my rights as an employee?


Legal answer: Generally an employee is entitled to the following kind of leaves: Maternity leave, paternity leave, sick leave, an emergency leave in case of  the death of a close member of the family and also an annual leave. All these are paid leave but in case of unpaid leaves it's different in each sector. 

In public sectors they allow an emergency leave, education leave or any other leave as long as you can prove that you have a sufficient reason. In private sectors you might be allowed an unpaid leave as long as you have sufficient reason and your absence will not hinder the output of the employer's expectations. So you can ensure that your absence will not interfere with employers need for sufficient outcome. But and if unpaid leave is long, an employer might choose to find a replacement during the employees absence to secure his need for production. 

So she may be entitled to leave but there are many risks involved, and three month is a long time for a person to be absent unless she is okay with a temporary replacement in which we don't know how it might end.





Stop Whining, Do Something For Your Yountry



LOVE OR HATE THEM, JEWS HAVE DEFIED ALL THE ODDS.

Just the other day I went to work my ass off like a programmed machine. Within minutes, I was complaining about the new program I was working on. My friend Euberstein next door couldn't help it and decided to come over to my cube. "Stop whining damn it", he shouted. "If you don't like it, do something about it", he kept on. He then leaned over closer to me and whispered:

1. Do you know why more than 90% of major media corporations are owned by jews?

2. Do you know why there are more than 10 jewish senators in the US senate while jews are less than 5% of the US population?

3. Do you know why every major company in the world has a jewish hand or head?

4. Do you know why hollywood is owned and controlled by jews?

5. Do you know why the signs "NO JEWS OR BLACKS" are no longer in the US beaches?

6. Do you know why most jews are in the finance and technology industry?

.......

on and on.... when I answered that I don't know, he said....it is because back in the days Jews stopped whining and decided to do something about themselves.

Well, as I looked around, I realized that most names in my department were actually Jewish. Most software programs in this company are written by jews before they are sent to india for development.

Waooo what a surprise. Few years ago, most Americans in the south hated jews so much that they likened them with niggers. Few years ago, most conservatives in America hated the "liberal media" because they associated the media with liberal jews. It is no surprise that they all jumped on to embrace FOX News thinking that they were getting something non-jewy before they were disappointed to learn that Rupert Murdoch has a jewish mother (which makes him- a jew).

Euberstein insisted that if I didnt like the program I was working on, I then should write a new one or develop my own (or start my own company) program. In essence, what he ment was the fact that; after realizing how much they were hated by the world, Jews decided to get themselves into the media (for PR), politics (policy), wars (security), technology (control), finance(to buy love), etc just to save themselves from the looming hell.

I always have my personal laptop on at work (jamboforums is also my web page). As I turned around to read new posts, I couldn't help it but lough at myself and my people. Tanzanians and most Africans are very good at complaining about their problems and misfortunes but also very good at doing nothing.

I voted for Augustine Mrema in 1995 election (first election to participate and probably the last) hoping that he would bring changes to the country and get rid of corrupted CCM leaders. Ten years later, I don't know if I should take my vote back or just shut up and move on. One thing I know for sure, I will try to get rid of corrupted African leaders by any means (even force) or I will just move on and permanently become the US citizen and start doing something about my life in the new adopted country.

Impactful Photographs and Their Stories

As a profession based around the objective reporting of society on a day to day basis, it is easy to see just how photography manages to enhance it quite so much. Listed below is a collection of the most impactful photographs ever captured with journalistic motive. Whether done so intentionally by a reporter covering a certain event in time or in more of a gonzo sense by those partaking in said event itself, they’re all rather remarkable.

10. Vietnamese Police Chief



The Vietnam conflict of the 1960’s and 70’s was in many ways the first ever war to be covered by the popular media. Beneficial in the sense that it allowed for the first time, public insight into the nature of modern warfare, this aspect cemented the conflicts undying place within contemporary history. Alongside the revolutionary air which was slowly reaching apex in the US during the war, there are a whole range of astonishing photographs that help bring this prominent era to life half a century later. This powerful image depicts a Saigon Police Chief about to kill a Vietcong prisoner at point blank range in the streets of the Vietnamese Capital. The prisoner is captain of a ‘revenge squad’, who earlier on this day in 1968 led a mission to execute a number of innocent citizens, whilst the executor is the, now notorious, General Nguyen Ngoc Loan. Photographer Eddie Adams won a 1969 Pulitzer Prize as a result of his capturing of this symbolic image.

9. Skyscraper Lunch



The origins of many of the world’s most impressive skylines and others urban environments are all too commonly overlooked. Whilst construction of skyscraper buildings may have slowed down somewhat in the past 50 years, or at least slowed to the point of becoming less notable thanks to their sheer popularity in the 20th century, much evidence of our towns and cities earlier days remains intact. This photograph is arguably one of the more notable amongst a whole host of collections documenting the extraordinary work that has gone into constructing the world around us. Taken on September 29th, 1932- it shows 11 workmen taking their lunch hour atop a constructional girder as their feet dangle above the streets below.

8. Afghan Girl



Afghanistan is a nation which has been ravaged with warfare for a large proportion of its very existence. Though the host of many an ancient battle, the Asian country has been famous amongst recent generations as the located of two large scale international invasions, not to mention two lengthy and untidy occupations. Namely the Soviet invasion of the 1980’s, and the US led UN invasion of the early 2000’s, it is hardly surprising that a fair few journalists have managed to become acquainted with the nations during this time. This iconic photograph was taken by Steve McCurry at a camp full of Afghan refugees just across the Pakistani border. Seizing the rare opportunity to fully photograph an Afghan female, the vivid image was featured on the cover of National Geographic in 1985, a year after it was taken.

7. The Burning Monk



An image which became known to me through its appropriation as the cover artwork for Rage Against the
Machines self-titled debut album, this photograph is famous amongst so many more people than fans of political rap metal bands, I’m sure. Taken on June 11th, 1963- the image depicts a Vietnamese Buddhist monk by the name of Thich Quang Duc self-immolating at a ‘busy intersection’ in downtown Saigon. His reason for carrying out such an act was in protest to Catholic repression upon Buddhist ideals amongst citizens of the troubled nation.

6. Water Fountain Segregation



Previous to the civil rights movement of the 1960’s and 1950’s the United States of America, along with much of the rest of the western world, was built upon a series of fundamentally and inherently racist and unequal societies. Whilst nowadays things are a lot more balanced, we can all too often forget the degree of prejudice fully active just 40 or 50 years ago. This photograph was taken in North Carolina in 1950, and shows a ‘coloured’ gentleman taking a drink from a segregated public water fountain. It was captured by photographer Elliot Erwitt and remains amongst some of the most famous images from this era, simple yet tastefully shot, and of course- completely effective in outlining the barbarity and backwardness of racial segregation.


5. A Fire in Boston



Tragedy is in many ways the most questioned topic when covered by the journalistic profession; however it is undoubtedly within the rights of a news media entrusted with the bringing of compelling stories to an ‘interested’ public to cover such cases regularly. Human interest stories lie at the very heart of the fourth estate as a whole, and without them it is doubtful that journalism would have been able to flourish and integrate to the degree that it has. The above picture encapsulates a story, which though is undoubtedly news worthy and within the realms of public interest, received widespread criticism upon its publishing in the Boston Herald in July 1975. Following a call to a fire on the cities Marlborough Street, fire-fighter Bob O’Neil found himself on the roof of the apartment building attempting to assist two females who were stranded on a fire escape. Unfortunately, the escape gave way and the two fell to the ground. Whilst the lady, Diana Bryant died, her god-daughter, Tiara Jones survived the fall.

4. Face of the Great Depression



The great depression of the early 20th century was in many ways an era far more disrupted and tarnished with turmoil than our current worldwide economic recession. These were the days before much of what now constitutes a modern welfare system was yet to be introduced, and those hit hard by the downturn were hit really, really hard. This photograph was taken at a Californian pea-pickers camp in the February of 1936 by photojournalist Dorothea Lange. The woman shown in the image is Florence Owens Thompson, a 32-year-old mother of seven whose husband had recently passed as a result of tuberculosis.

3. Kosovar Refugee Child



The war which unfolded in Eastern Europe in the 1990’s and continued into the early 2000’s is one that is often overlooked. Though this could be attributed to the Middle Eastern conflict which has held much of our western attention for over a decade now, there is nonetheless a whole wealth of content still available on the conflict. This image is surely one of the most iconic of the time, taken as the situation was beginning to relax in 2000; it depicts a 2-year-old Kosovar refugee, detained with his parents in an Albanian refugee camp, being delivered through a vicious looking barbed wire fence and into the hands of his grandparents on the outside. I’m sure all will be glad to know that the family was reunited shortly after the photograph was taken.

2. The Vulture and the Infant



This Pulitzer Prize winning snap was taken during the Sudanese famine of the early 1990’s. An extremely powerful and tragic image, it quite clearly shows a stricken infant jostling for life whilst a death-sensing vulture looks over it, waiting for the inevitable. Shocking the entire world upon its publication, no-one knows what became of the child; not even the man responsible for the image in the first place-Kevin Carter. In fact, shortly after the image stalked the cover page of just about every major publication in the entire world, Carter committed suicide as a result of a depression to which the situation surrounding this photograph presumably contributed greatly.

1. Omaha Beach, June 6th 1994



The D-Day landings of June 1994 were undoubtedly one of the most influential occurrences to take place in recent centuries. The invasion of mainland Europe from an Allied force with the sole intention of bringing Nazi Germany’s war machine to a swift halt was a task unfathomably huge. Achieving surrender within a year, the invasion which began with moments such as the one captured above, changed what seemed like an inevitable dark direction for planet Earth. This image is one of many captured on the morning of June 6th, 1944 by gonzo photojournalist Robert Capa, who landed as part of the first wave of US infantry. Despite capturing hundreds of what may only be imagined as unbelievable images on the day, only a few were developed successful as a result of a rush to have them ready for publication. The blurry effect, though accidental, is rather dramatic, as I’m sure you’ll agree- and the images (all of which can be found with a Google search) are said to have largely influenced Director Steven Spielberg during the making of his pivotal 1999 war epic ‘Saving Private Ryan’.

10 Facts About Dreams



10. Blind People Dream

People who become blind after birth can see images in their dreams. People who are born blind do not see any images, but have dreams equally vivid involving their other senses of sound, smell, touch and emotion. It is hard for a seeing person to imagine, but the body's need for sleep is so strong that it is able to handle virtually all physical situations to make it happen.

9. You Forget 90% of your Dreams

Within 5 minutes of waking, half of your dream if forgotten. Within 10, 90% is gone. The famous poet, Samuel Taylor Coleridge, woke one morning having had a fantastic dream (likely opium induced) - he put pen to paper and began to describe his "vision in a dream" in what has become one of English's most famous poems: Kubla Khan. Part way through (54 lines in fact) he was interrupted by a "Person from Porlock". Coleridge returned to his poem but could not remember the rest of his dream. The poem was never completed.

8. Everybody Dreams

Every human being dreams (except in cases of extreme psychological disorder) but men and women have different dreams and different physical reactions. Men tend to dream more about other men, while women tend to dream equally about men and women. In addition, both men and women experience sexually related physical reactions to their dreams regardless of whether the dream is sexual in nature; males experience erections and females experience increased vaginal blood flow.

7. Dreams Prevent Psychosis

In a recent sleep study, students who were awakened at the beginning of each dream, but still allowed their 8 hours of sleep, all experienced difficulty in concentration, irritability, hallucinations, and signs of psychosis after only 3 days. When finally allowed their REM sleep the student's brains made up for lost time by greatly increasing the percentage of sleep spent in the REM stage.


6. We Only Dream of What We Know

Our dreams are frequently full of strangers who play out certain parts - did you know that your mind is not inventing those faces - they are real faces of real people that you have seen during your life but may not know or remember? The evil killer in your latest dream may be the guy who pumped petrol in to your Dad's car when you were just a little kid. We have all seen hundreds of thousands of faces through our lives, so we have an endless supply of characters for our brain to utilize during our dreams.

5. Not Everyone Dreams in Color

A full 12% of sighted people dream exclusively in black and white. The remaining number dream in full color. People also tend to have common themes in dreams, which are situations relating to school, being chased, running slowly/in place, sexual experiences, falling, arriving too late, a person now alive being dead, teeth falling out, flying, failing an examination, or a car accident. It is unknown whether the impact of a dream relating to violence or death is more emotionally charged for a person who dreams in color than one who dreams in black and white.

4. Dreams are not about what they are about

If you dream about some particular subject it is not often that the dream is about that. Dreams speak in a deeply symbolic language. The unconscious mind tries to compare your dream to something else, which is similar. Its like writing a poem and saying that a group of ants were like machines that never stop. But you would never compare something to itself, for example: "That beautiful sunset was like a beautiful sunset". So whatever symbol your dream picks on it is most unlikely to be a symbol for itself.

3. Quitters have more vivid dreams

People who have smoked cigarettes for a long time who stop, have reported much more vivid dreams than they would normally experience. Additionally, according to the Journal of Abnormal Psychology: "Among 293 smokers abstinent for between 1 and 4 weeks, 33% reported having at least 1 dream about smoking. In most dreams, subjects caught themselves smoking and felt strong negative emotions, such as panic and guilt. Dreams about smoking were the result of tobacco withdrawal, as 97% of subjects did not have them while smoking, and their occurrence was significantly related to the duration of abstinence. They were rated as more vivid than the usual dreams and were as common as most major tobacco withdrawal symptoms."

2. External Stimuli Invade our Dreams

This is called Dream Incorporation and it is the experience that most of us have had where a sound from reality is heard in our dream and incorporated in some way. A similar (though less external) example would be when you are physically thirsty and your mind incorporates that feeling in to your dream. My own experience of this includes repeatedly drinking a large glass of water in the dream which satisfies me, only to find the thirst returning shortly after - this thirst… drink… thirst… loop often recurs until I wake up and have a real drink.

The famous painting above (Dream Caused by the Flight of a Bee around a Pomegranate a Second Before Awakening) by Salvador Dali, depicts this concept.

1. You are paralyzed while you sleep

Believe it or not, your body is virtually paralyzed during your sleep - most likely to prevent your body from acting out aspects of your dreams. According to the Wikipedia article on dreaming, "Glands begin to secrete a hormone that helps induce sleep and neurons send signals to the spinal cord which cause the body to relax and later become essentially paralyzed."

Bonus: Extra Facts

1. When you are snoring, you are not dreaming.

2. Toddlers do not dream about themselves until around the age of 3. From the same age, children typically have many more nightmares than adults do until age 7 or 8.

3. If you are awakened out of REM (Rapid Eye Movement) sleep, you are more likely to remember your
dream in a more vivid way than you would if you woke from a full night sleep.