Should you tell your children that Santa is a lie??

 

Should you tell your children the truth about Santa Claus? If so, when? What are the benefits for young minds in believing the myth of Kris Kringle?

Often around the holidays, parents of young children feel torn between whether or not they should come clean to their children about the non-existence of Santa Claus. To many parents, perpetuating the long-cherished myth is one of the joys of parenthood. Others view perpetuating the myth of Santa Claus as a fib when they are trying to teach their children not to lie. It is a dilemma the majority of parents face.  

Science Says Kids Are More Likely To Trust A Lie
It seems obvious that young children will easily believe what they’re told. But, a study in Psychological Science examining trust in three-year-olds discovered that unless kids were given a clue that they were hearing a lie, they will repeatedly trust what an adult tells them. In the experiment, one adult put a sticker under a red cup, but lied that the sticker was under an adjacent yellow cup. 

With some children, the adult placed an arrow on the yellow cup, helping them notice that what the adult was saying was incorrect. Interestingly, if the children were given a visual hint that what the adult was telling them was false, they were able to figure it out for themselves. But without a clue, the children believed the lie.

"Children have developed a specific bias to believe what they're told," said researcher Vikram K. Jaswal. "It's sort of a short cut to keep them from having to evaluate what people say.”

Believing Brings Some Unexpected Benefits
Allowing young children to believe in fantastical figures like Santa Claus, North Pole elves and magical reindeer can boost certain skills, according to social psychologist Dr. Lynda Breen. She stressed that letting young children embrace fantasy may be “valuable in their cognitive and social development.” Namely, the magical idea of Santa Claus is also “A symbol of hope and belief in him teaches children the values of role models, family bonding and sharing, as well as promoting cognitive benefits.”

Researchers from Lancaster University found that there’s even more positives in believing in Santa than promoting good values. In a 2010 study, researchers asked children to do certain tasks—like drawing objects and answering questions—after watching clips from Harry Potter films. They found that the clips expanded the children’s imaginations and abilities to think creatively. For instance, without watching the clips, some children weren’t able to draw an “imaginary object,” but were able to do so after engaging in the fantasy story.

The researchers found that besides entertainment, magical thinking “Can be viewed as an additional source of development of imagination and divergent thinking in children…magical thinking enables children to create fantastic imaginary worlds, and in this way enhances children‘s capacity to view the world and act upon it from multiple perspectives.”

And, as time goes on, it’s not likely your child will enter middle school still writing to Santa Claus. Jared Durtschi, at Kansas State University, explains that the transition should be gradual, however. "I don't think it's necessary for parents to decide upon a time to tell their children there is no Santa," Durtschi said. "As children develop, the magical thinking that is so common in kids, which allows them to so readily accept all the details of Santa Claus, will give way and they will soon figure it out on their own."

Every child’s transition period is different. As children grow and start to embrace more logical thinking, they’ll discern for themselves what they believe to be true or not.
When did you “spill the beans” about Santa Claus? Or, did your children make their own discoveries?

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The Letters Nelson Mandela Wrote to Winnie Madikizela-Mandela While Imprisoned Are Beautiful

 

 These are just a few of the letters Mandela wrote from Robben Island where he was sent in 1964 at the age of 46. Eighteen of his 27 years in prison were spent on the prison island.


From a letter dated Oct. 26, 1976:

My dearest Winnie,

I have been fairly successful in putting on a mask behind which I have pined for the family, alone, never rushing for the post when it comes until somebody calls out my name. I also never linger after visits although sometimes the urge to do so becomes quite terrible. I am struggling to suppress my emotions as I write this letter.

I have received only one letter since you were detained, that one dated August 22. I do not know anything about family affairs, such as payment of rent, telephone bills, care of children and their expenses, whether you will get a job when released. As long as I don't hear from you, I will remain worried and dry like a desert.

I recall the Karoo I crossed on several occasions. I saw the desert again in Botswana on my way to and from Africa--endless pits of sand and not a drop of water. I have not had a letter from you. I feel dry like a desert.

Letters from you and the family are like the arrival of summer rains and spring that liven my life and make it enjoyable.

Whenever I write you, I feel that inside physical warmth, that makes me forget all my problems. I become full of love.

Isn't it beautiful ?



April 15, 1976

My dearest Winnie,

Your beautiful photo still stands about two feet above my left shoulder as I write this note.

I dust it carefully every morning, for to do so gives me the pleasant feeling that I'm caressing you as in the old days. I even touch your nose with mine to recapture the electric current that used to flush through my blood whenever I did so. Nolitha stands on the table directly opposite me.

How can my spirits ever be down when I enjoy the fond attentions of such wonderful ladies?

June 26, 1977

My dearest Winnie,

Our daughters raised in hardship are grown women today. The first born has her own house and is raising her family.

We couldn't fulfill our wishes, as we had planned, to have a baby boy. I had hoped to build you a refuge, no matter how small, so that we would have a place for rest and sustenance before the arrival of the sad, dry days. I fell down and couldn't do these things. I am as one building castles in the air.

22, 1979

My dearest Winnie,

You looked really wonderful on 17/11, very much like the woman I married. There was color in your face. Gone was the choleric appearance and glazed look in your eyes when you are under pressure of over-dieting. As usual, I kept addressing you as Mum but my body kept telling me that a woman is sitting across this platform. I felt like singing, even if just to say Hallelujah!

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Tata Nelson Mandela (Madiba)

 

Freedom fighter, prisoner, moral compass and South Africa's symbol of the struggle against racial oppression.

That was Nelson Mandela, who emerged from prison after 27 years to lead his country out of decades of apartheid.

He died Thursday night at age 95.

His message of reconciliation, not vengeance, inspired the world after he negotiated a peaceful end to segregation and urged forgiveness for the white government that imprisoned him.

"As I walked out the door toward the gate that would lead to my freedom, I knew if I didn't leave my bitterness and hatred behind, I'd still be in prison," Mandela said after he was freed in in 1990.

Mandela, a former president, battled health issues in recent years, including a recurring lung infection that led to numerous hospitalizations.

Despite rare public appearances, he held a special place in the consciousness of the nation and the world.

"Our nation has lost its greatest son. Our people have lost a father," South African President Jacob Zuma said. "What made Nelson Mandela great was precisely what made him human. We saw in him what we seek in ourselves."

His U.S. counterpart, Barack Obama, echoed the same sentiment.

"We've lost one of the most influential, courageous and profoundly good human beings that any of us will share time with on this Earth," Obama said. "He no longer belongs to us -- he belongs to the ages."

A hero to blacks and whites

Mandela became the nation's conscience as it healed from the scars of apartheid.

His defiance of white minority rule and long incarceration for fighting against segregation focused the world's attention on apartheid, the legalized racial segregation enforced by the South African government until 1994.

In his lifetime, he was a man of complexities. He went from a militant freedom fighter, to a prisoner, to a unifying figure, to an elder statesman.

Years after his 1999 retirement from the presidency, Mandela was considered the ideal head of state. He became a yardstick for African leaders, who consistently fell short when measured against him.

Warm, lanky and charismatic in his silk, earth-toned dashikis, he was quick to admit to his shortcomings, endearing him further in a culture in which leaders rarely do.

His steely gaze disarmed opponents. So did his flashy smile.

Former South African President F.W. de Klerk, who was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize with Mandela in 1993 for transitioning the nation from a system of racial segregation, described their first meeting.

"I had read, of course, everything I could read about him beforehand. I was well-briefed," he said.

"I was impressed, however, by how tall he was. By the ramrod straightness of his stature, and realized that this is a very special man. He had an aura around him. He's truly a very dignified and a very admirable person."

For many South Africans, he was simply Madiba, his traditional clan name. Others affectionately called him Tata, the word for father in his Xhosa tribe.

A nation on edge

Mandela last appeared in public during the 2010 World Cup hosted by South Africa. His absences from the limelight and frequent hospitalizations left the nation on edge, prompting Zuma to reassure citizens every time he fell sick.

"Mandela is woven into the fabric of the country and the world," said Ayo Johnson, director of Viewpoint Africa, which sells content about the continent to media outlets.

When he was around, South Africans had faith that their leaders would live up to the nation's ideals, according to Johnson.

"He was a father figure, elder statesman and global ambassador," Johnson said. "He was the guarantee, almost like an insurance policy, that South Africa's young democracy and its leaders will pursue the nation's best interests."

There are telling nuggets of Mandela's character in the many autobiographies about him.

An unmovable stubbornness. A quick, easy smile. An even quicker frown when accosted with a discussion he wanted no part of.

War averted

Despite chronic political violence before the vote that put him in office in 1994, South Africa avoided a full-fledged civil war in its transition from apartheid to multiparty democracy. The peace was due in large part to the leadership and vision of Mandela and de Klerk.

"We were expected by the world to self-destruct in the bloodiest civil war along racial grounds," Mandela said during a 2004 celebration to mark a decade of democracy in South Africa.

"Not only did we avert such racial conflagration, we created amongst ourselves one of the most exemplary and progressive nonracial and nonsexist democratic orders in the contemporary world."

Mandela represented a new breed of African liberation leaders, breaking from others of his era such as Robert Mugabe by serving one term.

In neighboring Zimbabwe, Mugabe has been president since 1987. A lot of African leaders overstayed their welcomes and remained in office for years, sometimes decades, making Mandela an anomaly.

But he was not always popular in world capitals.

Until 2008, the United States had placed him and other members of the African National Congress on its terror list because of their militant fight against the apartheid regime.

 

Humble beginnings

Rolihlahla Mandela started his journey in the tiny village of Mvezo, in the hills of the Eastern Cape, where he was born on July 18, 1918. His teacher later named him Nelson as part of a custom to give all schoolchildren Christian names.

His father died when he was 9, and the local tribal chief took him in and educated him.

Mandela attended school in rural Qunu, where he retreated before returning to Johannesburg to be near medical facilities.

He briefly attended University College of Fort Hare but was expelled after taking part in a protest with Oliver Tambo, with whom he later operated the nation's first black law firm.

In subsequent years, he completed a bachelor's degree through correspondence courses and studied law at the University of Witwatersrand in Johannesburg. He left without graduating in 1948.

Four years before he left the university, he helped form the youth league of the African National Congress, hoping to transform the organization into a more radical movement. He was dissatisfied with the ANC and its old-guard politics.

And so began Mandela's civil disobedience and lifelong commitment to breaking the shackles of segregation in South Africa.

Escalating trouble

In 1956, Mandela and dozens of other political activists were charged with high treason for activities against the government. His trial lasted five years, but he was ultimately acquitted.

Meanwhile, the fight for equality got bloodier.

Four years after his treason charges, police shot 69 unarmed black protesters in Sharpeville township as they demonstrated outside a station. The Sharpeville Massacre was condemned worldwide, and it spurred Mandela to take a more militant tone in the fight against apartheid.

The South African government outlawed the ANC after the massacre, and an angry Mandela went underground to form a new military wing of the organization.

"There are many people who feel that it is useless and futile for us to continue talking peace and nonviolence against a government whose reply is only savage attacks on an unarmed and defenseless people," Mandela said during his time on the run.

During that period, he left South Africa and secretly traveled under a fake name. The press nicknamed him "the Black Pimpernel" because of his police evasion tactics.

Militant resistance

The African National Congress heeded calls for stronger action against the apartheid regime, and Mandela helped launch an armed wing to attack government symbols, including post offices and offices.

The armed struggle was a defense mechanism against government violence, he said.

"My people, Africans, are turning to deliberate acts of violence and of force against the government in order to persuade the government, in the only language which this government shows by its own behavior that it understands," Mandela said at the time.

"If there is no dawning of sanity on the part of the government -- ultimately, the dispute between the government and my people will finish up by being settled in violence and by force. "

The campaign of violence against the state resulted in civilian casualties.

Long imprisonment

In 1962, Mandela secretly received military training in Morocco and Ethiopia. When he returned home later that year, he was arrested and charged with illegal exit of the country and incitement to strike.

Mandela represented himself at the trial and was briefly imprisoned before being returned to court. In 1964, after the famous Rivonia trial, he was sentenced to life in prison for sabotage and conspiracy to overthrow the government.

At the trial, instead of testifying, he opted to give a speech that was more than four hours long, and ended with a defiant statement.

"I have fought against white domination, and I have fought against black domination," he said. "I have cherished the ideal of a democratic and free society in which all persons live together in harmony and with equal opportunities. It is an ideal which I hope to live for and to achieve. But if needs be, it is an ideal for which I am prepared to die."

His next stop was the Robben Island prison, where he spent 18 of his 27 years in detention. He described his early days there as harsh.

"There was a lot of physical abuse, and many of my colleagues went through that humiliation," he said.

One of those colleagues was Khehla Shubane, 57, who was imprisoned in Robben Island during Mandela's last years there. Though they were in different sections of the prison, he said, Mandela was a towering figure.

"He demanded better rights for us all in prison. The right to get more letters, get newspapers, listen to the radio, better food, right to study," Shubane said. "It may not sound like much to the outside world, but when you are in prison, that's all you have."

And Mandela's khaki prison pants, he said, were always crisp and ironed.

"Most of us chaps were lazy, we would hang our clothes out to dry and wear them with creases. We were in a prison, we didn't care. But Mandela, every time I saw him, he looked sharp."

After 18 years, he was transferred to other prisons, where he experienced better conditions until he was freed in 1990.

Months before his release, he obtained a bachelor's in law in absentia from the University of South Africa.

Calls for release

His freedom followed years of an international outcry led by Winnie Mandela, a social worker whom he married in 1958, three months after divorcing his first wife.

Mandela was banned from reading newspapers, but his wife provided a link to the outside world.

She told him of the growing calls for his release and updated him on the fight against apartheid.

World pressure mounted to free Mandela with the imposition of political, economic and sporting sanctions, and the white minority government became more isolated.

In 1988 at age 70, Mandela was hospitalized with tuberculosis, a disease whose effects plagued him until the day he died. He recovered and was sent to a minimum security prison farm, where he was given his own quarters and could receive additional visitors.

Among them, in an unprecedented meeting, was South Africa's president, P.W. Botha.

Change was in the air.

When Botha's successor, de Klerk, took over, he pledged to negotiate an end to apartheid.

Free at last

On February 11, 1990, Mandela walked out of prison to thunderous applause, his clenched right fist raised above his head.

Still as upright and proud, he would say, as the day he walked into prison nearly three decades earlier.

He reassured ANC supporters that his release was not part of a government deal and informed whites that he intended to work toward reconciliation.

Four years after his release, in South Africa's first multiracial elections, he became the nation's first black president.

"The day he was inducted as president, we stood on the terraces of the Union Building," de Klerk remembered years later. "He took my hand and lifted it up. He put his arm around me, and we showed a unity that resounded through South Africa and the world."

Broken marriage, then love

His union to Winnie Mandela, however, did not have such a happy ending. They officially divorced in 1996.

For the two, it was a fiery love story, derailed by his ambition to end apartheid. During his time in prison, Mandela wrote his wife long letters, expressing his guilt at putting political activism before family. Before the separation, Winnie Mandela was implicated in violence, including a conviction for being an accessory to assault in the death of a teenage township activist.

Mandela found love again two years after the divorce.

On his 80th birthday, he married Graca Machel, the widow of former Mozambique president, Samora Machel.

Only three of Mandela's children are still alive. He had 18 grandchildren and 12 great-grandchildren.

Symbolic rugby

South Africa's fight for reconciliation was epitomized at the 1995 rugby World Cup Final in Johannesburg, when it played heavily favored New Zealand.

As the dominant sport of white Afrikaners, rugby was reviled by blacks in South Africa. They often cheered for rivals playing their national team.

Mandela's deft use of the national team to heal South Africa was captured in director Clint Eastwood's 2009 feature film "Invictus," starring Morgan Freeman as Mandela and Matt Damon as Francois Pienaar, the white South African captain of the rugby team.

Before the real-life game, Mandela walked onto the pitch, wearing a green-and-gold South African jersey bearing Pienaar's number on the back.

"I will never forget the goosebumps that stood on my arms when he walked out onto the pitch before the game started," said Rory Steyn, his bodyguard for most of his presidency.

"That crowd, which was almost exclusively white ... started to chant his name. That one act of putting on a No. 6 jersey did more than any other statement in bringing white South Africans and Afrikaners on side with new South Africa."

A promise honored

In 1999, Mandela did not seek a second term as president, keeping his promise to serve only one term. Thabo Mbeki succeeded him in June of the same year.

After leaving the presidency, he retired from active politics, but remained in the public eye, championing causes such as human rights, world peace and the fight against AIDS.

It was a decision born of tragedy: His only surviving son, Makgatho Mandela, died of AIDS at age 55 in 2005. Another son, Madiba Thembekile, was killed in a car crash in 1969.

Mandela's 90th birthday party in London's Hyde Park was dedicated to HIV awareness and prevention, and was titled 46664, his prison number on Robben Island.

A resounding voice

Mandela continued to be a voice for developing nations.

He criticized U.S. President George W. Bush for launching the 2003 war against Iraq, and accused the United States of "wanting to plunge the world into a Holocaust."

And as he was acclaimed as the force behind ending apartheid, he made it clear he was only one of many who helped transform South Africa into a democracy.

In 2004, a few weeks before he turned 86, he announced his retirement from public life to spend more time with his loved ones.

"Don't call me, I'll call you," he said as he stepped away from his hectic schedule.

'Like a boy of 15'

But there was a big treat in store for the avid sportsman.

When South Africa was awarded the 2010 football World Cup, Mandela said he felt "like a boy of 15."

In July that year, Mandela beamed and waved at fans during the final of the tournament in Johannesburg's Soccer City. It was his last public appearance.

"I would like to be remembered not as anyone unique or special, but as part of a great team in this country that has struggled for many years, for decades and even centuries," he said. "The greatest glory of living lies not in never falling, but in rising every time you fall."

With him gone, South Africans are left to embody his promise and idealism.

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Interview with Psquare!

Paul and Peter Okoye, better known as P Square, have a lifestyle the stuff of dreams. The twin brothers are unlikely to look back and regret their decision to abandon football for music. At home and abroad


Our journey into the music world
It started like a dream but today, we thank God all the glory because it has become a reality. When we started, we had late Michael Jackson as our mentor. That was why in one of our songs titled, Busy Body which we released about 12 years ago, we tried to copy Michael Jackson’s dance steps.

Then, our fans used to call us, Paul and Peter. He influenced our musical career. We were challenged by Michael Jackson’s huge achievements in the world of music. We said to ourselves, if Michael Jackson could do all of these, we could equally do better. So, we tried our best and by the grace of God and our fans, we have realise our dreams.

Deal with Konvict music
The only thing we can say, is that we have been signed under Konvict. And to prove this new deal which most people are still doubting, we featured Akon in our “Chop my Money” remix.

Our private life!
You call it private and that’s why, most times we don’t like to discuss it for personal reasons.

Handling your female fans!
My dear, it is not easy. However, we handle everybody with love and care. One thing is to be a celebrity, and another is knowing how to handle all that comes with it. Sometimes, they will call on us just to hear our voices and to wish us well.

What do you do during your leisure time?
Sometimes, we swim or play basketball with our friends.

Why was J. Martins not featured in your latest album, “Invasion”?
We have no problem with J Martins. He was not in the country when we released the album. You know as we are busy so also are others too. And you don’t expect them to displease themselves in order to please you. But we are in good terms.

Challenges in the industry so far….
A lot of challenges, sometimes after releasing an album our marketers will want to give us condition that we go 50/50. It’s very difficult to compromise with them. Sometimes, if you enter the studio to record you song, they will compel you to do what you wouldn’t want to do.

The craziest thing you have ever done!
Laughs.. that was when we went for a night party some years ago. Some desperate girls were all over us and before we knew what was happening, they were kissing and romancing us openly. We had to run for our dear lives.

Most embarrassing moment
It was when we were coming up. Some of our kinsmen walked up to us and told us that its high time we join them in the village and stop roaming about as if we are not conversant with the tradition of our people. We felt embarrassed. But unfortunately, we later adhered to their advice.

How do you feel about your mum’ s death?
We feel so bad to know that our mum is no more. But who are we to question the Almighty God. Traditionally, we are supposed to bury her and not the other way round. It is just that it happened so soon.. Indeed, her death was a big blow to us.

It was rumored that you people knew what happened to her?
Then, it is too bad to hear that people are accusing us of being responsible for our mum’s death. We are not blaming anybody. People are free to say what they want to say. We begin to wonder whether there is anything that will ever make us to go for the life of our beloved mother.

Her life cannot be quantified in terms of money or fame. So, our answer to this question is that we have no hand in our mum’s death. We only blame the death that snatched her away from us if not so, people won’t be pointing accusing fingers at us. She died after a brief illness.

Aside your mum’s death, there was another rumor that you guys have joined Illuminati?
We are short of words. Why would anybody say such things about us? Well, the fact remains that we do not belong to any secret cult, whether Illuminati or anything you call it. We owe our achievements and everything that is happening to us to Almighty God

No doubt, P Square is the most successful African act, and this is evident with the massive success of their numerous concerts in the continent.

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Sex,Emotions and Mary's Vagina

 

Emotions have a place in sex which cannot be severed no matter how many glasses of scotch you have before engaging in boudoir acrobatics. Also, don’t drink too much before engaging in boudoir acrobatics because it alters your performance (makes women better and men “not better”). Your past is a lesson my children. Learn it. Let me testify about my own past in hopes that it will inspire you to celebrate your own.

Let’s talk about sex baby. Let’s talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be. Almost a decade ago, during a period my friends respectfully refer to as “back when you had a vagina”, I was an emotional young lad. How emotional? When other boys were watching Smallville to see a teen Superman hit stuff, I was watching it wondering when he and Chloe were finally going to finally figure out that they are perfect for each other. In retrospect, I kind of had that “vagina” shot coming.

But my emotions had nothing to do with a vagina. Yes ladies, you are not that special. All of us are emotional. Men just divert their emotions into aggressive activities. That’s why men spiral into abnormal sadness when their favorite soccer team loses a match. It’s the same feeling most women get when the stars of their favorite telenovela refuse to get their shit together (that is SO annoying, isn’t it?).

Why is it good that I was emotional? Well, I learned that from a woman's lady bits. Let’s call her Mary. She was a longtime crush I had in my youth. Five years long to be exact. We had a few “close encounters” but nothing to write gloating letters to Hugh Hefner about. Quite frankly, I was her bitch. She gave me just enough affection to keep me on her hook but kept me far enough from “the prize” that I kept trying. 

Eventually I wore her down and she gave me the biscuit and my friends, it was incredible. Well worth the wait. Words like “explosive” can be used to describe the interaction. I still have fantasies about that day. It was THAT good even by modern day comparisons.

It was good for one very important reason. Emotions! By the time I was given access into the “garden” I was pent up full of them. So the release was like breaking open a dam. I kid you not, I sort of felt like something had stabilized in me. Like I was a balloon about to burst then someone let the air out all of a sudden. I am no seasoned Casanova, I haven’t slept with 100 women, but I have had a “reasonable” amount of “experience”. But one thing is certain. It is always better when emotions are involved… ALWAYS!

Also, be safe… Don’t be stupid! Even if you and your paramour are both in love and disease free, if you are reading this, you are NOT READY to be a parent! This is because of the fact that you are getting advice about such sensitive matters from a madman with an internet connection and a thesaurus!



Courtesy:andrewonyango

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5 reasons men lose interest in ladies

Those first weeks or months of encounters and dates seem to be filled with such great promise, high hopes and exciting possibilities. And then the balloon pops, the sizzle fizzles and the spark goes dark — at least for him. All of a sudden, those nights filled with LOLs turn into days full of WTFs.

Why do some guys lose interest when things seem to be going so well? Here are a few thoughts that might help you make some adjustments that could help you increase his attention span.

1. Too Easy:

Guys definitely thrive on conquest. But, if the woolly mammoth just followed the hunter home and jumped on his barbecue pit, it would not have tasted so sweet, and the celebration surrounding the feast would be short and boring.

The hunt is what gives significant value to the conquest. Men believe that anything worth having is worth working hard for or even fighting for.

Things gained too easily don’t carry a high value. You would have never seen a squirrel’s head hanging on a cave wall, but you might have seen the head of a saber-toothed tiger. Give the sexual tension a chance to build so your amazing gift can be appreciated more fully and with a bigger burst of delight for your man. Sure, sometimes the mood can be magnetic and the time can be right early on, so go ahead and capture the magic of the moment. Just make him wait an extra date or two for the encore.

2. Too Serious:

Women often look for a solid provider and protector, and then they will choose one who is also a good playmate. Men look for a fun playmate. They will eventually zero in on one who can also challenge them and complete them in other ways.

Early on, men are captivated and blown away by the wonderland of your femininity. They don’t fall in love the same way you do or for the same reasons.

You may be ready to take the emotional aspect of the relationship to the next level, but he’s still enjoying the honeymoon. You may be ready for him to move in and begin a commitment, but you’re getting way ahead of where his head is at.

He may be ready too, but he doesn’t know it yet. Until he figures out for himself that he needs you and that you have become a necessary part of him, your love and tightening grip will seem like a trap, a prison and the end of freedom and life as he knows it. He will get scared and run away.

Once he’s had his “Aha” moment, he will see the commitment of love for the paradise it is, and he will gladly join you there. Don’t move too fast, even if he says he loves you.

3. Too Controlling:

Men are independent creatures by nature. They may appreciate a little fashion advice, if it doesn’t change their self-image. But they don’t want you to schedule their itinerary for them.

They don’t want to be expected to show up someplace for you without proper notice and their approval. They don’t want their cave to be redecorated into someone else’s concept of good living. They don’t want to swap their French fries for baby carrots, and they don’t even want to know why they should.

Imagine that you met a prince and just wanted to go out with him. Well, the palace guard comes to your place and takes over. They replace everything in your closet with snobbish-attire. They cut your fingernails and remove the cute little designs in favor of cherry red polish to match your new required lipstick. Your piercing jewelry is discarded, your little butterfly tattoo is removed, your gold necklace is replaced with pearls, and your hair is chopped into a bob with no highlights.

All you wanted was to kiss the cute guy and maybe pull his pants down, but you never bargained for anything like this. Men are trainable. You just have to ease into the adjustments. If you tighten the bolts too hard or too fast, you’ll strip the nuts and they’ll fall off. Ouch.

4. Too Scary:

They made a movie about how to lose a guy in 10 days. Sometimes a woman’s habits or actions send up too many red flags, and a guy just has to scamper away. Too much talk about your ex, describing what your babies will look like, or being too needy and clingy are not only red flags, they’re kind of creepy. It’s hard to hold back all of your amazing qualities, but sometimes it’s for the best.

5. No Spark:

Romance is a two-way street. You have to like him, and he has to like you. Remember that men are often attracted first by the candy, and then they learn to appreciate the woman that you are.

It should be no surprise, then, that things may begin with a lot of excitement and heat, both of which can fade quickly.

His natural instincts tell him that the hunt ends with the conquest, so it is up to you to show him another dimension of your value as a partner that will keep him interested. Still, not all relationships are meant to be. Your traits and interests that are perfect for one man may mean nothing to the next.

The bottom line is that you want as many things as possible to pull your man closer to you and as few things to drive him away. When it comes to the physical, emotional or psychological aspects of your relationship, try to allow your man to feel free, independent, un-threatened, challenged, in control, and content.

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L3FT HANDERS ANTHEM

LEFT HANDERS ANTHEM

This is for the LEFT handed man whose LEFT rib
i suppose created a LEFTY Eve,

for the LEFT handed poet
whose pen found the pages
'LEFT blank' and wrote verses that LEFT us inspired

for the LEFT handers who have LEFT earth
But their 'LEFT legacies' still live on
for they lived their lives the right way,

This is for the LEFT handed boxer
whose left hook LEFT his opponent
Lying down the ring floor

For the LEFT handed painters
like Davinci and Michelangelo
who have gone
but LEFT paintings that still glow

I wrote this with my LEFT hand
For the LEFTY man
who want to marry a LEFTY lady,
have LEFTY kids
And create a LEFTY trinity that
he is yearning for,

I wrote it for the LEFT handed kids
who were LEFT scared
when told the devil uses a LEFT hand

For the LEFT handers
who were born LEFT handed on planet earth
living with right handed people
who think with their LEFT brain

I too was born LEFT handed
but LEFT stranded,
had to lean on my mother's LEFT shoulder,
And she raised a LEFTY soldier
I salute her with my LEFT hand

So I wrote this with my LEFT hand
for all the LEFT handers
living on planet earth
doing everything in a LEFT way,
to the melodious beats of the heart
in our LEFT chest 
until we kick the bucket
I suppose with our LEFT leg. 

Nelson Allen Jr.  nel-sonofAfrica 2013

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Erasto Mpemba and The "Mpemba Effect"

 In a country where science is highly avoided by many, I doubt if the majority of Tanzanians know the name Erasto Mpemba.  Erasto Mpemba is globally credited for the “Mpemba effect” a scientific discovery in 1963 by him where he observed that hot water freezes faster than cold water!

Although such famous people as Aristotle, Sir Francis Bacon and René Descartes described the Mpemba Effect, it is named after Erasto Mpemba, who noticed that, at equal quantities, boiling water will freeze faster than water at room temperature.

Back in the 1960′s, Erasto, aged 13, was making ice cream at Magamba Secondary School. He noticed that when the ice cream was hot and started to freeze, it froze quicker than if it was already cold. His teacher dismissed the result, calling it “Mpemba’s physics” and subjected him to some ridicule.

In fairness to the teacher, the result did fly in the face of accepted physics (Newton’s Law of Cooling), but to refuse to believe a student strikes me as being poor teaching, not to mention unscientific.

Fast forward a few years and a Dr. Denis Osborne visited Mkwawa High School, where Erasto had moved and where the “Mpemba Physics” jibe had continued, when he continued to ask questions about the effect. Dr Osborne was also sceptical, but set out to show Mpemba that he was wrong, by repeating the experiment together. Of course, the new work proved Mpemba correct, much to everyone’s surprise.

In 1969, they published a joint paper on the Mpemba Effect, as a result of which they discovered that
many eminent scholars from Aristotle to Descartes had noted a similar phenomenon. Currently, the reason for the Mpemba Effect is still unknown.

It time for the government to use Mpemba's image in trying to inspire our fledgling youth who are constantly stumbling when it comes to education. And for Mpemba, he should be awarded the highest honor of the nation

No one up to date has the true definition of the mpemba effect..........

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The BoringTusker Project Fame

Sunday evenings are usually boring, i spend most of my time recovering from the weekend damage caused by the amazing Tusker lager. And part of my heeling is listening to good music. When i heard Tusker Project Fame was coming back for season 6, I thought i had something to look forward to.

In this season’s Tusker Project Fame, the contestants are terrible. Really, I don’t know whether to blame the sound system or their voices. I blame the judges, those who were traveling the region in search of East Africa’s next big music act. I don't believe this is the best talent they can find in East Africa.

Granted, their performances aren’t doing it for me but the sound system needs more work. Surely there must better microphones in the worldwide market? Ones that don’t look like they were plucked out from the local church?

And at times those coaches go on and praise this guys who choose complex songs and can't even deliver. Judges, Ian and Hermy try to give honest opinions but at times the singing from all the contestants is so bad, forcing them to just give positive comments.

I know, this show helps in strengthening the bond of East Africans, but seriously it looks like a joke. I just can't handle watching this thing on TV. By the way,where did the previous winners go?

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Movie Review; 12 Years a Slave

One of the things that have been thrown around for months now is the notion that awards season voting bodies won't respond to it because it's too "difficult" to sit through. Let's define difficult, shall we? Is it difficult to see the first openly gay politician gunned down by his closeted colleague? Is it difficult to see a reformed convict put to death by our country for his crimes? Is it difficult to see a mother choose which one of her children dies during the Holocaust? I'd argue that these answers add up to a resounding yes. Yet, no one threw those phrases of "too difficult" around.

I've watched hundreds of films throughout my short 22-year history and I've seen some difficult cinema. Steven Spielberg's "Schindler's List" can make anyone quiver in shame as it shows the despicable reality of the Holocaust. Paul Greengrass' "United 93", which is almost an emotional biopic of America's darkest hour, makes me want to crawl up into a ball and cry. And finally, Mel Gibson's "The Passion of the Christ", one of the highest grossing films of all-time, shows the labor of our sins fleshed out into the beaten skin of an honest man. And still, no one threw these hyperbolic terms out saying, "it's too hard watch." Is it because this is an American tragedy, done by Americans? Is it the guilt of someone's ancestors manifesting it in your tear ducts? I can't answer that. Only the person who says it can. The structure of this country is built on the backs and blood of slaves. But slavery didn't just exist in America, it was everywhere. It was horrifying what occurred for over 200 years and believe it or not, still exists in some parts of the world TODAY.

Now when approaching the powerful film by McQueen and distributed by Fox Searchlight Pictures, there is a resounding honesty that McQueen and screenwriter John Ridley inhabit. There are no tricks or gimmicks, no cheap takes on a side story or character that is put there for time filling or a life-lesson for Solomon to learn. Everything is genuine. Is the film heartbreaking? Oh my God yes. Did I cry for several minutes after the screening? Embarrassingly so. I was enamored the entire time, head to toe, moment to moment.

I have long admired the talent that's been evident in the works of Chiwetel Ejiofor. I've known he was capable of what he has accomplished as Solomon Northup and he hits it out of the park. He has the urgency, worry, and drive to get home to his family and executes every emotion flawlessly even when all hope seems to be lost. Where he shines incredibly are the small nuances that he takes as the story slows down, you notice aspects of Solomon that make him even more believable.

As Edwin Epps, Solomon's last owner, Michael Fassbender digs down deep into some evil territory. Acts as the "Amon Goeth" of our tale, he is exactly what you'd expect a person who believes this should be a way of life to behave. He's vile and strikes fear into not only the people he interacts with but with the viewers who watch. As Mrs. Epps, Sarah Paulson is just as wretched. Abusive, conniving, entitled, and I loved every second of her.

Mark my words; Lupita Nyong'o is the emotional epicenter of the entire film. The heartache, tears, and anger that will grow inside during the feature will have our beautiful "Patsey" at the core. She is the great find of our film year and will surely go on to more dynamic and passionate projects in the future. You're watching the birth of a star.

Hans Zimmer puts forth a very pronounced score, enriched with all the subtle ticks that strike the chords of tone. One thing that cannot be denied is the exquisite camera work of Sean Bobbit. Weaving through the parts of boat and then through the grassroots of a cotton field, he puts himself in the leagues of Roger Deakins and Seamus McGarvey as one of the most innovative and exciting DP's in the business. Especially following his work in "The Place Beyond the Pines" earlier this year. Simply marvelous.

Oscar chances, since I know many of you are wondering. Put the Oscar's in my hands, you have a dozen nominations reap for the taking. Best Picture, Director, Lead Actor, Supporting Actor, dual Supporting Actresses, Adapted Screenplay, Production Design, Cinematography, Costume Design, Film Editing, Makeup and Hairstyling, Original Score. There's also a strong and rich sound scope that is present. The sounds of nature as the slaves walk or as Solomon approaches his master's house is noticed. The big question is, can it win? I haven't seen everything yet so I cannot yet if it deserves it or not. I can say, if critics and audiences can get off this "difficult" watch nonsense and accept the cinematic endeavor as a look into our own history as told from a great auteur, there's no reason it can't top the night. I'm very aware that seeing this film along with Steve McQueen crowned by Oscar is nearly erasing 85 years of history in the Academy. Are they willing and ready to begin looking into new realms and allowing someone not necessarily in their inner circles to make a bold statement as McQueen and Ridley take in "12 Years a Slave?" I remain hopeful.

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Hisia Might Just Have What it Takes to Win The Tusker Project Fame

Its safe to say that Tanzania hasn't been particularly shinning in the Tusker Project Fame. We have seen considerable success through Peter Msechu and by distant from Hemed. We haven't really had impressive singers with star quality. In Hisia maybe trend might change

Young, funny and vastly talented, Hisia might just be what Tanzania needs to prove to the rest of East Africans we have what it takes. With our two contestants out on the first day, who with honesty were not all that great. We now look up to Hisia and Angel to bring the money and pride back home.

From the minute Hisia walks into a room, the room lights up. Charming and funny, this International Business Major at USIU – Africa is always cracking a joke and telling a funny story. However, Hisia is serious about one thing, and that is performance.Hisia loves his mother (who shares his deep passion for singing). Hisia knew he wanted to be on Tusker Project Fame from a while back, and he chased his dream to take the stage.

 

Q: What habits annoy you the most?

A: Hypocrisy

 

Q: What is the one thing you cannot do without?

A: Water and my guitar

 

Q: What is your favourite colour?

A: Red, It looks good on me... at least the girls say so.

 

Q: Who is your music role model and why?

A: John Legend, because I like the emotion in his voice

 

Fun Facts about Hisia:

Hisia is the KiSwahili word for Emotion.

If Hisia won Tusker Project Fame, he would invest half the money, and the rest in the entertainment business.

Hisia is single... and figured that when the time is right, it will happen.

Hisia has been to the UK to attend Primary School.

Hisia’s ideal night out on a Saturday would be a place where there is live music



       Goodluck hisia, and bring the money home

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Julius Kambarage Nyerere:

Today all across the country (Tanzania) we celebrate  Nyerere Day, marking the day of Julius Nyerere's death in 1999. We celebrate his life in remembrance of the great things he had done to this nation and Africa as a whole.

One of Africa’s most respected figures, Julius Nyerere (1922 — 1999) was a politician of principle and intelligence. Known as Mwalimu or teacher he had a vision of education that was rich with possibility

 
Julius Kambarage Nyerere was born on April 13, 1922 in Butiama, on the eastern shore of lake Victoria in north west Tanganyika. His father was the chief of the small Zanaki tribe. He was 12 before he started school (he had to walk 26 miles to Musoma to do so). Later, he transferred for his secondary education to the Tabora Government Secondary School. His intelligence was quickly recognized by the Roman Catholic fathers who taught him. He went on, with their help, to train as a teacher at Makerere University in Kampala (Uganda). On gaining his Certificate, he taught for three years and then went on a government scholarship to study history and political economy for his Master of Arts at the University of Edinburgh (he was the first Tanzanian to study at a British university and only the second to gain a university degree outside Africa. In Edinburgh, partly through his encounter with Fabian thinking, Nyerere began to develop his particular vision of connecting socialism with African communal living.

On his return to Tanganyika, Nyerere was forced by the colonial authorities to make a choice between his political activities and his teaching. He was reported as saying that he was a schoolmaster by choice and a politician by accident. Working to bring a number of different nationalist factions into one grouping he achieved this in 1954 with the formation of TANU (the Tanganyika African National Union). He became President of the Union (a post he held until 1977), entered the Legislative Council in 1958 and became chief minister in 1960. A year later Tanganyika was granted internal self-government and Nyerere became premier. Full independence came in December 1961 and he was elected President in 1962.

Nyerere’s integrity, ability as a political orator and organizer, and readiness to work with different groupings was a significant factor in independence being achieved without bloodshed. In this he was helped by the co-operative attitude of the last British governor — Sir Richard Turnbull. In 1964, following a coup in Zanzibar (and an attempted coup in Tanganyika itself) Nyerere negotiated with the new leaders in Zanzibar and agreed to absorb them into the union government. The result was the creation of the Republic of Tanzania.

Ujamma, socialism and self reliance

As President, Nyerere had to steer a difficult course. By the late 1960s Tanzania was one of the world’s poorest countries. Like many others it was suffering from a severe foreign debt burden, a decrease in foreign aid, and a fall in the price of commodities. His solution, the collectivization of agriculture, villigization (see Ujamma below) and large-scale nationalization was a unique blend of socialism and communal life. The vision was set out in the Arusha Declaration of 1967 (reprinted in Nyerere 1968):

"The objective of socialism in the United Republic of Tanzania is to build a society in which all members have equal rights and equal opportunities; in which all can live in peace with their neighbours without suffering or imposing injustice, being exploited, or exploiting; and in which all have a gradually increasing basic level of material welfare before any individual lives in luxury." (Nyerere 1968: 340)

The focus, given the nature of Tanzanian society, was on rural development. People were encouraged (sometimes forced) to live and work on a co-operative basis in organized villages or ujamaa (meaning ‘familyhood’ in Kishwahili). The idea was to extend traditional values and responsibilities around kinship to Tanzania as a whole.

Within the Declaration there was a commitment to raising basic living standards (and an opposition to conspicuous consumption and large private wealth). The socialism he believed in was ‘people-centred’. Humanness in its fullest sense rather than wealth creation must come first. Societies become better places through the development of people rather than the gearing up of production. This was a matter that Nyerere took to be important both in political and private terms. Unlike many other politicians, he did not amass a large fortune through exploiting his position.

The policy met with significant political resistance (especially when people were forced into rural communes) and little economic success. Nearly 10 million peasants were moved and many were effectively forced to give up their land. The idea of collective farming was less than attractive to many peasants. A large number found themselves worse off. Productivity went down. However, the focus on human development and self-reliance did bring some success in other areas notably in health, education and in political identity.

Liberation struggles

A committed pan-Africanist, Nyerere provided a home for a number of African liberation movements including the African National Congress (ANC) and the Pan African Congress (PAC) of South Africa, Frelimo when seeking to overthrow Portuguese rule in Mozambique, Zanla (and Robert Mugabe) in their struggle to unseat the white regime in Southern Rhodesia (now Zimbabwe). He also opposed the brutal regime of Idi Amin in Uganda. Following a border invasion by Amin in 1978, a 20,000-strong Tanzanian army along with rebel groups, invaded Uganda. It took the capital, Kampala, in 1979, restoring Uganda’s first President, Milton Obote, to power. The battle against Amin was expensive and placed a strain on government finances. There was considerable criticism within Tanzania that he had both overlooked domestic issues and had not paid proper attention to internal human rights abuses. Tanzania was a one party state and while there was a strong democratic element in organization and a concern for consensus, this did not stop Nyerere using the Preventive Detention Act to imprison opponents. In part this may have been justified by the need to contain divisiveness, but there does appear to have been a disjuncture between his commitment to human rights on the world stage, and his actions at home.

Retirement

In 1985 Nyerere gave up the Presidency but remained as chair of the Party - Chama Cha Mapinduzi (CCM). He gradually withdrew from active politics, retiring to his farm in Butiama. In 1990 he relinquished his chairmanship of CCM but remained active on the world stage as Chair of the Intergovernmental South Centre. One of his last high profile actions was as the chief mediator in the Burundi conflict (in 1996). He died in a London hospital of leukaemia on October 14, 1999.

 "We will always remember you" : Msongo

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J. J. Abrahams:

Biography for
J.J. Abrams
 

Date of Birth

27 June 1966, New York City, New York, USA

Birth Name

Jeffrey Jacob Abrams

Height

5' 7" (1.70 m)   



Mini Biography

Jeffrey Jacob "J.J." Abrams (born June 27, 1966) is an American film and television producer, screenwriter, director, actor, and composer. He wrote and produced feature films before co-creating the television series Felicity (1998–2002). He also created Alias (2001–2006) and co-created Lost (2004–2010), Fringe (2008–present), and Undercovers (2010). Abrams directed the films Mission: Impossible III (2006), Star Trek (2009), and Super 8 (2011) and produced the films Cloverfield (2008) and Morning Glory (2010). 

Early life
Abrams was born in New York and raised in Los Angeles where he attended Palisades Charter High School. He is the son of television producer Gerald W. Abrams and executive producer Carol. Abrams, who is Jewish, attended Sarah Lawrence College. 

Career
Abrams's first job in the movie business started when he was 16 when he wrote music for Don Dohler's film Nightbeast. During his senior year at college, he teamed with Jill Mazursky to write a feature film treatment. Purchased by Touchstone Pictures, the treatment was the basis for Taking Care of Business, Abrams's first produced film, which starred Charles Grodin and Jim Belushi. He followed that up with Regarding Henry, starring Harrison Ford, and Forever Young, starring Mel Gibson. 

Abrams collaborated with producer Jerry Bruckheimer and director Michael Bay on the 1998 film, Armageddon. That same year, he made his first foray into television with Felicity, which ran for four seasons on The WB Network, serving as the show's co-creator (with Matt Reeves) and executive producer. He also composed its opening theme music.

Under his production company Bad Robot, which he founded with Bryan Burk in 2001, Abrams created and executive-produced ABC's Alias and is co-creator (with Damon Lindelof) and executive producer of Lost. He later co-wrote the teleplay for Losts third season premiere "A Tale of Two Cities". As with Felicity, Abrams also composed the opening theme music for Alias and Lost.
In 2001 Abrams co-wrote and produced the thriller Joy Ride, and wrote an unproduced screenplay for a fifth Superman film in 2002. 

In 2006 he served as executive producer of What About Brian and Six Degrees, also on ABC. Abrams directed and wrote the two-part pilot for Lost and remained active producer for the first half of the season. That same year he made his feature directorial debut in 2006 with Mission: Impossible III, starring Tom Cruise.

In 2008 Abrams produced the monster movie, Cloverfield. In 2009 he directed the science fiction film Star Trek, which he produced with Lost co-creator Damon Lindelof. While it was speculated that they would be writing and producing an adaptation of Stephen King's The Dark Tower series of novels, they publicly stated in November 2009 that they were no longer looking to take on that project. 

He is one of the creators of the Fox Network series Fringe, for which he again composed the theme music.
Abrams is featured in the 2009 MTV Movie Awards 1980s-style digital short "Cool Guys Don't Look at Explosions", with Andy Samberg and Will Ferrell, in which he plays a keyboard solo. 

Personal life
Abrams is married to public relations exec Katie McGrath and has three children: sons August and Henry and daughter Gracie. He resides in Pacific Palisades, California. 

Abrams has made donations to the Democratic Party. Campaigns he has contributed to include those of Bill Clinton, Barack Obama, Bill Bradley, John Edwards, Hillary Clinton, Bob Casey, Jr., Mark Udall, Harry Reid, Russ Feingold, and Patrick J. Kennedy. However, he has also donated $2,000 to the Republican Robert Vasquez.

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